Monday, September 20, 2010

Simple men

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When was the last time that you went out with your girlfriends? You most likely had a great time chatting away and the time probably passed quickly. If you go out to meet members of the opposite sex in this way, you may start to notice that not many approach your pack. In fact, don’t be surprised if not a single man approaches you all night. This seems bizarre but quite often happens. The reason is simple, men are afraid. Men are fearful of this situation for several reasons and many times choose to avoid it. Believe it or not large groups of women intimidate men. One of the first reasons is down to simple convenience. If a man is interested in just one person, he doesn’t want to wade through 4 or 5 others to get to the one he wants. He wants to go straight for his target and try is luck. Men also avoid this situation because of their egos. Flirting with someone is difficult enough. Things could go well or you could crash and burn. When it comes to crashing and burning, a man would rather do it without an audience. Finally, men fear crowds of women for fear of what they might do. If a man decides to flirt with their friends and does it badly, he may have to not only deal with the one he insulted but all of her friends as well. This could prove to be a highly stressful and volatile situation. Women do frequently go out together, sometimes for safety and others just for companionship. If you are with friends try separating frequently. This will give the poor man an opportunity to approach and try his luck. You may also want to refrain from talking to your friends for a bit. Some men find it rude to interrupt. If you take a breather then they may approach when the opportunity presents itself. Flirting can be both fun and a challenge. Some find it hard to believe that men find it just as hard, if not harder than women. If you’re with your friends, perhaps separate or stop your conversation. You may notice someone who has noticed you.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Classic novels

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Believe it or not you likely have a lot of interesting and unique things about you. Perhaps you like to dress a certain way or wear you hair in a particular manner. Anything like this can help you to flirt and be attractive to others. Uniqueness attracts attention and once that happens, the flirting can begin. In this article we will discuss how to attract and flirt by being unique and interesting. Something you need to do is to let that person know you are interested. Many people make the mistake of shying away when they see someone they find interesting or attractive. If you see someone that you find attractive, don’t turn away and take every effort not to notice them. Try smiling and even saying hello. Some fear looking too obvious but this is exactly what you want. If this person doesn’t know you like them then you could loose your opportunity. Something that you should try is to be interesting by acting interested. When you meet someone and start talking, let them have the majority of they conversation. You don’t have to just sit there and be talked at by allow them to have about 60 percent of the floor. Your showing them you interested in what they say which is a very attractive quality. Finally, find something unique about yourself and show it off. If you like colorful clothing than wear it. If you like certain books then be seen carrying and reading them. This will attract those that have similar tastes to you. Whatever you do, don’t put up a front. Don’t be seen with classic novels just because the one you know the one you’re interested in likes them. This needs to be a genuine interest not a made up one. These plans always backfire. Flirting can be quite fun and not as difficult as many think. They key to attracting people to you is using your uniqueness. Get yourself noticed with your interests and soon you will find people coming to you. In turn, be interested in others and you’ll soon find many of great people to flirt with and get to know better.

Friday, September 17, 2010

Slouch

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Ever notice someone that you would like to get to know better? Ever look over and see someone looking back at you? Are you afraid of letting someone know how you feel because you are afraid they might not be interested? Well you’re not alone. Nearly all of us at some point in our lives have felt this way. If you really want to get that person’s attention, and find out if they could be interested in you then learn to flirt. Flirting is a great way to seek out the information that you want. It also does not have to be very emotional. If the other person doesn’t respond then you can move on to someone or something else. Knowing how to flirt effectively is they key to getting them interested and keeping them that way. In this article we will look at way people do flirt and offer some tips on how to do it effectively. One of the first rules of flirting is to never do it for the sake of it. Although flirting is relatively harmless, you are playing with another’s emotions. Flirting with someone your not interested in just isn’t nice. The next rule of flirting is not to worry about what you say as much as how you look and what you are doing. When someone sees you, they give slightly over half of their attention to how you look. Make sure you look nice and are dressed for the occasion. You just want to be noticed, not to shock people. The next item of importance is your body language. About one third of their attention will go to this. Watch what you do. Make sure you not doing anything embarrassing with your hands or moving about to much. Stand up straight, don’t slouch and look confident. Finally, a small part of flirting does go to what is said. Try to stay calm. If you are naturally funny or charming then use this to your advantage, If not then the less said the better. Try to engage in a friendly conversation. To find out if that special someone is interested in you then try flirting. By flirting, you will draw attention and hopefully attract the one that you want. By paying attention to how you look, what you do and what you say to a degree, you could be well on your way to finding that special soul mate.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Drinks

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You have to pay for a membership to meet others. Those are just a few of the different cons that you may be facing. Of course, you should take into consideration the fact that your potential cons are not listed here. Nevertheless, our next tip is what will help you to get the most out of online dating. Analyzing The Good And The Bad Each time that there is a negative comment in your mind about online dating, figure out the benefits it can offer. For example, one of the problems that many have is paying for a membership. While no one likes doing that, think about it this way. If you pay for a membership, you don't have to pay for all of those drinks or dinners with others that are people you didn't want to meet. It is more affordable, actually, to work with people that you have already determined are right for you. Another thing people say about online dating is that they just don't want to take that first step and contact the other person. No problem. Later on, we will dedicate a chapter to learning how to converse with others for the first time. And, we will show you how you can actually make this something that is beneficial to you.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Good first impression

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Online dating is a great way to meet new people without having to face the bar scene. Chat rooms are one way that you can talk to someone new and exciting so that you can determine if you want to date them in the real world. You can enjoy some good conversation in a chat room without having to worry about dressing up to make a good first impression. You first impression will rely totally on how you present yourself online through the words that you type. There are, however, some things that you need to know so that you stay safe in the chat room and don’t start agreeing to meet the wrong type of people in the real world. You need to protect your identity at all times. If you’re going to provide an email address for further contact with someone make sure that you don’t give them your personal or work email address. Set up an email account that you use only for chatting online such as Hotmail, Yahoo, or Gmail. If you’re going to put personal information in your online profile make sure that you only include information that people can use to learn enough about you to be interested in more conversation. This can include your age, your gender, and your interests. Never include information about where you live. Try to be honest when you’re chatting with people online. This is particularly true if you’re chatting online to find a potential date. If you start to lie about how you look, what you do, your interests, or any other personal information, you’ll be setting yourself up for a fall if you decide to meet this person offline. You expect honesty from those people you’re talking to so give them the same courtesy. Don’t expect too much from the people you meet in a chat room. You have no idea what they are really like so it’s best not to arrange an offline date after the first chat. Agree to meet online a few more times for online internet chatting before you agree to meet in a public place. If you’re going to be exchanging photos with someone that you meet online try to use a current photo so that the other person has a good idea of what you really look like. It’s important to be as honest as you can so that if do meet this person offline there are no surprises for either of you.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Break ups

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Online dating is just like dating someone that you meet offline: there is always that question about what to do if it’s time to break up. Whether it’s you or the other person who decides that it’s time to end the relationship it’s never easy to do. Perhaps when it comes to online dating there are always more break-ups as people find out more and more about each other over a period of time. And let’s face it…if one relationship isn’t working out, there is always another online date out there for you. If you know that you’re no longer interested in seeing someone try not to drag it out for too long. If you’re on the first date and you know that it just isn’t going to work you should be honest with your date so that you don’t give them the impression that you want to see them again. Although this may be brutally honest it will save you a lot of heartache in the future. Be honest about your feelings without hurting the other person. Rather than tell them what you think is wrong with them try to put the focus back on yourself. Tell them that you just don’t feel as though there is any connection for you. Thank them for the date but make it clear that you won’t be going out again. Many people think that if the dating and romance part of the date didn’t work out that there may be a chance of friendship. Be honest with yourself. If you’re doing the online dating thing you’re probably not looking for new friends but want romance instead. If you’ve been dating someone you met online for a while the break up will be harder. Make sure that you give the other person a chance to talk about their feelings so that you end the relationship on a good note with both of you feeling as though you have reached a good level of closure. Don’t break up with someone in a public place. You don’t want to humiliate them if things don’t go smoothly. Online dating comes all of the same issues as dating someone that you meet offline. Whether you end up dating long term, or call it quits after one date, you’ll still be making the same decisions about your relationship that you would if had met offline. The thing to keep in mind is that you’re in control of who you date and for how long you want to continue seeing them.

Moments of silence

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Any first date can be extremely tense and stressful whether it’s a date that you’ve set up online or offline. Many times you’ll act too shy or insecure to even be considered for that second date. This can be devastating at the best of times but even more so if you were really hoping for that second date with someone you liked. There are some things that you can do to make sure that you leave a good impression and get a second chance. Make your date feel as comfortable as possible. Relax and realize that you’re just there to have a good time so there should be no pressure to be overly cute or funny. The most important that you can remember is to be yourself. Be as interesting as you can without coming across as overbearing. The worse thing that you can do is sit there with nothing to say or add to the conversation. Be a good listener and make sure that you ask your date questions so that you learn more about them and so that they know you are interested and paying attention. If your date has a sense of humor, try to laugh at some of their jokes. Hopefully they won’t bore you with too many jokes but keep in mind that if they do it could be a sign of their nervousness. Try to keep the conversation going at all times since long moments of silence can be awkward and leave your date wondering if you’d rather not be there. Have a list of questions in your head that you can pull out when there is too much silence. The more interest that you show in the date the more fun you’ll have and the more chance there will be for future dates. Try to plan your date around something fun. A first date doesn’t need to revolve around the movies or dinner. If you and your date are both interested in the arts you might want to suggest a trip to the art gallery. This will be a good ice breaker for the two of you and can let you both relax in an environment that you enjoy. Be confident in your ability to have a good time while being yourself. If you have to pretend that you’re someone you’re not there will be little point to the first date or any other dates. First dates don’t have to be intimidating and stressful if you take some time to plan for them and go prepared.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Profile headers

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Most online dating websites will encourage you to have a short profile header line that is used with your username. This profile header line is usually used in searches that other members do to find appropriate matches for what they are looking for in someone they want to meet. Don’t make the mistake of putting just anything into your profile header since this will leave you with responses to your online dating ad that you don’t want. You want to have a profile header line that gets you immediate attention. This includes lines that are funny, cute, or philosophical. You want to encourage the right people to click on your profile and find out more about you. There are some aspects of the profile header line that you should focus on so that you get the most mileage out of these few short words. Avoid using headers that hundreds of other people use and that by now are becoming very boring. Overused headers are those such as “I’m the one you’re looking for” or “want to meet new people”. You don’t want to be part of the rest of the crowd who is looking for an online date. You want to stand out from the rest with a description of who you are. Take a look at other profile headers before you start writing your own. Choose headers that interest you and try to come with a similar slant. Determine what it is about those headers that you like and why. Some successful header ideas are “Sharp spark wants to ignite similar paths” or “Here I am…do you have any other wishes”. The insight of other profile headers can guide you in being creative with your own. Your profile header is one way that you can filter out your potential online dates from those that aren’t even in the running. If you want to increase the number of people who are interested in you for the right reasons you can include some specifics in your header line such as “Looking for 24-30 year old man who loves to golf” or “You need to be at least 5’9” to get on this ride”. Change your profile header every once in a while so that you get more responses to your online ad. Come up with a cute new header every week so that you’re attracting different kinds of people. You might want to think about changing your photo just as often so there is a fresh angle on you each week for new members to find.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Going on a picnic

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When you’re finally ready to meet someone on a first date who you’ve met online, you’ll want to have a great first date idea in mind. First dates can sometimes be a bit difficult to work out since there are many things that you want to take into consideration. Your final choice for a first date idea will depend on how much you want to spend, whether it’s a day time or night time date, and the interests that the two of you share. Since you met online you’ve probably each shared your likes, dislikes, and interests, so narrowing down something to do on your first date should be easy. You might want to choose an inexpensive date for the first time around so that you can each pay your own way and not feel obligated to pay for a second date. Some good inexpensive date ideas include: • The movies. Going to the movies is always a good choice since it breaks the ice while allowing both of you to get a feel for the other person. Let your date choose which film you’re going to see. Don’t plan for coffee afterwards; make the decision for coffee or a drink after the movie is over since you don’t want to assume that you’ll want to spend time together after the film has finished. • A picnic. If this is a day time date consider going on a picnic if the weather permits. Take along a basket of food and wine and enjoy the day just relaxing in the sun as you get to know each other. • Museum or art gallery: If you know that you both enjoy art or history this is a great first date idea. You can spend a couple of hours doing something that you both enjoy so there will be less tension and stress If you’re feeling a bit more extravagant there are some expensive dates that you can go on. Keep in mind that you want to be sure that your date is comfortable with these types of dates since they require a bit more planning and consideration: • Concert: Take your date to a concert. This type of date will need planning ahead of time so that you can make sure that you have the tickets in hand. You’ll also want to make sure that your date is interested in the concert that you’ve chosen. • Dinner: An expensive dinner is a nice way to celebrate a first date but should be reserved for someone you feel particularly attracted to. Expensive dinners can often send a message to your date that they are worth it but might also convey the feeling that there is another date in the future. • Theater: Tickets to the theater are perfect if you and your date share the same enthusiasm for the stage.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Good listening skills

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Online dating can be just as difficult for men as it can be for women. One thing that men need to keep in mind is that you never get a second chance to leave a good impression. It’s often a one time deal and you need to make the most of that first impression. Before you panic there are some things that you can do to make your online dating experience a success. Perhaps the most important thing to do is be on time for the date. If you arrive late you’ll be sending out the message that you don’t really care enough about the date to be there on time. Lateness is good indication to women that you’re not reliable and that you can’t be counted on. Try to arrive a few minutes early so that you look as though you’re eager for the date to begin. Take some time to prep for your date and focus on your grooming. You don’t want to arrive to your first date looking unshaven and unkempt. Women enjoy a date that takes care of himself. Do everything that you would do if this first date were a second or third date and you really want to leave a good impression. If your appearance is in question the woman won’t be able to see past your looks to the person you are inside. Consider arriving with a small gift. Women love the thoughtfulness of a date that arrives with a little something such as flowers or a box of chocolates. You don’t want to go overboard but you do want to let the woman know that you’re appreciative of the chance to go out with her. You want to be a gentleman whenever possible and this means holding doors, pulling out chairs, and letting her walk through doors before you. Women enjoy the feeling of being pampered and respected. And just think, it might lead to a second date! Practice good listening skills on your first date. No woman wants to spend time with a man who spends the whole time talking about himself. The goal of a first date is to get to know each other so that you can decide if you have enough in common and enough attraction to go out on a second date. Women are attracted to men who are interested in what they have to say. Use your intuition when it comes to that first date. Be honest about what you’re thinking and feeling at the end of it. Don’t promise that you’ll call if you have no intention of contacting her again. Women appreciate honesty even if it hurts.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Blue is a color

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One question that many people ask about online dating is what colors they should wear in their photo that will get them the most attention. Your online profile is the only way that people are going to filter you out from the rest of the people who are looking for the perfect date. You need to make sure that you stand out from the rest in any way that you can without lying about who you are. One of the ways that you can make sure that you get noticed is to have an online photo that is as flattering as it can be. And to do this there are certain colors that you should wear for maximum impact. Appearance matters both in the real world and online. A good photo is going to enhance your online profile in a positive way. Try to wear clothing that you like and that you feel comfortable in. This will project a positive and upbeat image to anyone searching through the profiles of an online dating site. Wear colors that make you feel attractive and confident. These feelings will come across loud and clear in your photo. The number one choice when it comes to colors is blue. Blue is a color that is associated with peacefulness and tranquility. You’ll look relaxed and calm when you’re wearing an outfit that is blue in color. Blue is also associated with loyalty and will convey a message to people that you are someone who they can trust. Green is the second choice for colors to wear in your online photo. Make sure that you can wear green since there are many people who don’t have the right skin tone for this color. For men, dark green is a color that is equated with masculinity and wealth. Green is easy on the eyes and will leave a good impression with people who are looking for a confident date. Red is a color that is usually associated with lust and sexuality. You might want to stay away from this color unless you want to attract a lot of attention from casual daters. Black is also considered to be a sensual color that is very alluring. If you’re trying to look a bit thinner, black is a good choice for you. White and yellow should be your last choice of colors to wear in an online photo. These colors will give you a washed out and pasty look, leaving you with an aura that is on the depressing side.

False pretences

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When it comes to online dating the competition is fierce and intense. Some people will do whatever it takes to get those dates including lying on their profile and including photos that are outdated. It’s important that you be honest with yourself both in your profile and with the pictures that you upload for others to see. Attracting dates using false pretences can only lead to trouble in the future. There are some important things that you need to focus on when you’re building your online profile. You want your profile to be as honest as possible and say as much about you as it can. The following are specific aspects that you can focus on to get the ideal profile for your online dating adventures. Try to avoid being negative. Negative talk about your job, your life, or your past dates is a big turnoff to future dates. You want to be positive and upbeat about whom you are without lying or embellishing. In the world of online taking being positive is like a magnet. Everyone wants to find that special someone who is positive and exciting. Negativity will get you few dates, and the ones that you do get will be just as negative as you are. Let potential dates know that you want to meet “winners”. This will encourage only upbeat and successful people to respond to your profile. Try to be as unique as you can in the way you write your profile. Don’t just let people know that you like music and walks along the beach. Be specific about the music that you enjoy listening and the types of beaches that you’ve walked along. Use descriptive words that are different such as “a sizzling hot day on the beach” rather than “a hot day at the beach”. You want to make your profile as un-ordinary as you can without sounding like a complete flake. When you write your profile you don’t just want to get as many responses as you can. You want to get the right responses from the type of people who you are attracted to. Filter the responses that you get by being specific about what you’re looking for. Make sure that you list the age requirements of potential dates so that you don’t end up with responses from people of all ages. Remember that this is your profile and you’re the one who is in charge of who you date. Update your profile at least once every two weeks if you’re not getting the responses that you want.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Slim women

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You want your online profile to be a great as possible so that your online dating experience is as positive and successful as it can be. One way that you can improve the communication that you get from potential dates is by stating clearly and precisely what it is that you’re looking for. If you’ll only date people who are three years older or younger than you, you need to be clear about this condition in your profile. If you say that you “want to meet new people” you’ll most likely be flooded with interested people from all around the world. You need to be clear about what it is that you want from a date. Your subject line should be used as a filter. When you put certain specifics into your subject line you narrow down the type of people who want to respond to your online ad. Be exact about only dating men who have no facial hair if this is important to you. And if you’re a man who will only date slim women you should try to include something about this condition in your subject line whether or not it seems shallow or not. Why leave yourself open to dating all types of people if there are some who you’re just not interested in? Let people know what actions you’ll take if they are interested in you. For instance, if you want people to email you for further communication make this clear to them when you respond to their introductory email to you. Most online dating sites will have a chat room so that you can “chat” with people who are interested in you before you agree to a real date. When you’re communicating with people try to use grammar that is correct and not offensive. Don’t start calling someone “sexy” or “baby” since this can leave a bad first impression and never get you that first date. Use their real name that they give you or the name that they use in their profile. Always be respectful of anyone you meet online whether you’re meeting in real life or communicating with them online. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that since this is an online thing that you can lose this respect through anonymity. Remember that anyone who shows an interest in you is a potential date that could lead to a long term relationship.

Blind dates

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You have a good idea of what the pros and the cons of online dating are right? Pros: You get to meet others from around the world when it is convenient to you. You get to find that right person for you without having to deal with the bar scene or with blind dates. The pressure is lower as emails are easier than phone calls. You can find people online that are just like you, that already possess the qualities that you are after. No more dealing with situations where you meet people that are no where near someone you are interested in. You get to handle online dating the way that you want to. It's safer. There are more possibilities. Those are just a few of the benefits that are out there when it comes to online dating. Yet, there are some things that are not necessarily good things. Cons: You are not seeing these individuals in person for the first time. You may not be able to meet them locally for a while if they do not live near you. You have to count on what they tell you or provide about them in their profile is actually true.